Review: Damn Average Longstang

The first time I saw pictures of the Longstang, I was not impressed.  It looks simple… long, tapering to above-average girth, fairly smooth.  No wild texture, fairly small head, long and straight… just those three bumps on the shaft.  And yet…I’d heard people rave about it, calling it one of the greatest toys in their collections. When a sale popped up at Damn Average, I decided I had to check it out for myself.


Ordering from Damn Average is easy and fun.  Pick your toy and leave a message in your order letting the owner (Sheep) know what colors and firmness you’d like. 1  Super soft is marshmallow squishy, soft is more like a gummy bear and firm is described as “comparable to an erect penis but bendier”.   Sheep is willing to try whatever color scheme you dream up (within reason) or you can ask for a surprise.  I requested a marble of screaming fluorescent pink with pearlescent white.  I think Sheep makes the most beautiful marbled toys I’ve ever seen…I can get lost staring at the swirls and loops.

Side view Longstang

At 11 inches in length (10″ insertable), Longstang lives up to its name.  It is one of the longest toys in my collection.  The shaft tapers from about 1.4″ down to about 2.0″ in diameter toward the base.  The finish on the silicone is on the matte/silky side, so it isn’t an unholy lint magnet or lube hog.  The firmness is exactly as expected.  It doesn’t compress much when squeezed, but the Longstang is still very flexible.  That, as it turns out, is a very good thing.

The size of the Longstang confused me initially.  Accommodating as my vagina may be, it’s not able to take in 10+ inches of length.  At first, I tried thrusting with it using the added length as a handle.  That was when I realized the magic of the bumps.  With each stroke, those bumps perfectly massaged my G-spot.  The sensation can be varied by taking long strokes to use all three nubs, or shorter strokes to slide one bump back and forth quickly.

I used the Longstang in tandem with a vibrator on my clitoris…then inspiration struck.  I set the vibrator aside, grasped the Longstang by the base instead of the shaft, and bent it upward toward me while inserted.  The length of the toy allows it to give external and internal stimulation at the same time.  With quick, shallow thrusts, the top nub rubs my G spot while the lowest nub slides back and forth over my clit.  Orgasms resulting from this technique are nothing short of spectacular.  The presence of a towel, waterproof pad or throe is highly recommended.  I have also heard that using this in the shower can be very enjoyable…but clumsy as I am, I would likely end up in the emergency room.

As with all silicone toys, clean up is easy.  Soap and water is fine for day-to-day cleaning, use boiling water, bleach solution or dishwasher to sterilize.  I stick to water-based lube.  If you want to try silicone lube with the Longstang, test it on a small patch of the base of the toy to make sure there’s no interaction.

For all its apparent simplicity, the Longstang has proven to be a unique and amazing toy.  If you are interested in the Longstang but have concerns about the size, Damn Average also offers a smaller version called the Thinstang.

Get a Longstang or Thinstang at Damn Average !


  1. Sheep runs a one woman operation.  From time to time, custom orders are disabled so she doesn’t get overwhelmed.  Follow her on Tumblr or Twitter to see when customs are being opened or new stock is being posted.
1 Comment
  • ChickMakesDick
    April 18, 2017

    I am so impressed by DA’s marbles as it’s quite an art form. I can only hope to one day get such nice results! I’ll have lots of fun learning though :).

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