It’s good to have goals, and here we are in the season of New Year’s resolutions. Aside from the usual aspirations (kick ass, look good doing it, and so on) I’ve been thinking about the sex toys I hope to try in 2015. They say people who have friends to keep them on track are more likely to stick with their resolutions. So I’m putting them all out here on the blog, as extra inspiration for me to go after my dream toys. At the end of the year, we’ll all see how I did. Presenting, in no particular order, the toys I want to get my hands and other parts on this year:
Sqürm – Hole Punch Toys
It’s a little bit crazy, a little bit twisted, and some people have no idea what to do with it. In other words, it’s the sex toy version of me. If I needed further incentive, it’s also purple. My plan is to try it out solo then, without saying a word about how I used it, hand it to my partner to see what he comes up with. And then maybe add a glass or two of wine to see if that provokes any further variations.
Aside from its funky looks and experimentation potential, I want the Sqürm because I adore Hole Punch Toys. They are a company that makes quality sex toys with an irreverent sense of humor (see my review of their Crotch Rocket). I’m inherently goofy myself, and wholeheartedly champion the importance of laughter in the bedroom, so Hole Punch toys are a perfect fit for me. Pun totally intended.
Treant – Exotic Erotics
I had to narrow this down, because I am completely psyched about everything in Exotic Erotics new High Fantasy line. Orcs, Wraiths, Reptilians… and who would have guessed the secrets those Halflings are hiding? But the Treant won its place in this post because of the amazing coloration of its silicone, its texture and that little extra branch. I have one other silicone dildo with a similar tendril. I enjoy it immensely, but occasionally wish it were a bit more substantial. I think the Treant could be exactly what I’ve been craving.
Mona Wave – Lelo
OK, so this one is kind of cheating. I already have a Mona Wave en route to me thanks to the fine folks at Lelo. But I’m so excited about it that I had to include it on my wish list. I’m curious how that wave motion will work for me, and admittedly, I’m drawn to shiny new electronic gadgetry of all sorts. Stay tuned for my review!
It’s not available for sale yet, but ever since reading Dizzy and Millennia’s reviews, I have the almightiest need for this vibrator. It’s rumbly, and the larger end is a full two inches in diameter… the dream vibe for a girth fanatic. Others have tried to conquer it and walked away in defeat. Put me in, coach! I can do it! Give my vagina a chance to tackle this behemoth!
It’s not brand new, but I’m fascinated by the squeeze-control technology. Yes, my gadget geekery has me swooning. I want to rub it on my clit, and play with it as a stress toy, and marvel at the existence of this brightly colored electronic fruit. I’ve fondled it on visits to toy shops, sighed longingly at others’ reviews, and it’s time for me to have a Limon of my own.
We Vibe Touch (new version)
Every time I pull out my old Touch, I think longingly of the velvety matte silicone of the new version. I love my Touch, since the Tango is a bit overwhelming for me unless inserted in another toy. I like the slight dampening/broadening effect of the added silicone covering…I just want one that attracts slightly less lint/fuzz/fur.
Scorn the Wyvern – Bad Dragon
I’ve been staying away from BD for awhile, but Scorn the Wyvern has my attention. It’s thick, it’s curved, it’s covered in crazy texture. It’s like Crackers and Apollo fused together into a new and fascinating dildobeast1. The medium looks like a more than adequate match for my vagina’s voracious appetite!
Petunia – Primal Hardwere
I know what you’re thinking. “Lunabelle, you crazy sex toy hoarder, that is a penetrable toy. You do not possess the appendage it is designed to fit over and stimulate.” And it’s true, I do lack a penis. My partner does, though I haven’t solicited his opinion on the ducking of tentacle maws. But you see, penetrating Petunia plays no part in my preposterous plan.2 With a slim, firm toy inside, I’m thinking that I could use Petunia as a fat, tentacle dildo. If nothing else, it’s texture would feel great squishing against my clit. I love my Neigh Sayer and Pedro the Cactus, and I want to try another Primal Hardwere creation.
There you have it… the toys I’ll be wishing for, dreaming of, and chasing down in 2015. Let me know what toys you have your eye on down in the comments…I’m always looking for more great ideas!