Partner Play: Dildos and Double Penetration

Note: For the purposes of this post, I’ll be talking about my own experiences/fantasies involving double penetration (specifically, double vaginal).  Also, the dildo pairs in photos are put together more for artistic flair than as a recommendation.

The year was 1994, and a much younger version of me was making out with a college boyfriend in his dorm room.  During a pause in the action, Jesse offered to show me one of his favorite porn movies.  I was curious, since he’d mentioned the tape (yes, this was in the dark days when my porn access was still limited to VHS tapes) before, but hadn’t gone into detail about why it was so special.

The scene began with fairly vanilla sex between a man and a woman.  It was good, but I couldn’t understand why he was so into it.  And then the second guy walked in.   Apparently there was a fortuitous overlap in our porn preferences after all!  We were both heavily into the scene (and helping each other fully enjoy it) when he breathily whispered “oh, here it is…watch!”

Double Penetration Carter and Centuro

New York Toy Collective Carter and Babes N Horny Centuro

I’d never seen double vaginal penetration before.  It hadn’t occurred to me that such a thing was possible.  But that visual, combined with his skillful fingers on my clit, brought me to a nearly instantaneous, earth-shattering orgasm.  Suddenly, I had a new goal in life, a fantasy that launched dozens of masturbation sessions.

But despite our shared enthusiasm, it wasn’t a goal that we managed to achieve before our passionate yet unstable relationship fell apart.  Finding a trusted and receptive third was too big of a challenge.  My later partners weren’t at all receptive to the idea of a threesome involving a second penis, and after a few years I concluded that some fantasies just aren’t meant to be.  I was engaged, and it was time to put those wild ideas from my college days behind me.

Well, for a while, anyway…

Opportunity Knocks

Fast forward about 20 years.  I’m pushing forty and starting to realize that those unexplored fantasies of my youth aren’t dead, they were just sleeping.  And I’ve found myself a play partner whose desires are a near-perfect complement to my own.  He’s dominant, I’m submissive.  He loves experimenting with sex toys, I’m a blogger with a gigantic collection.  He’s got a voyeuristic streak, I’m a bit of an exhibitionist.

Double Penetration - Bandit and Vamp Super Soft

Vixen Creations Bandit and Tantus Vamp Super Soft

Eventually, I disclosed to my partner that double penetration was one of my favorite fantasies.  I paused before adding that I was particularly drawn to double vaginal penetration.  And then I waited.  Usually, the responses I received were along the lines of “good luck with that”, “no way” or even just plain “ew”.   To my surprise, I learned we were in alignment on this kink too.

Lacking a third party to assist us, he eagerly suggested that we give double penetration a shot with one of my toys acting as a stunt cock.  I was not at all opposed to that plan.

Pre-Game Planning

In preparation for the event, I went through my collection in search of the best dildo for the job.  Rather than simply studying dimensions, I tried out a variety of dildos paired with one that roughly approximated the size and shape of my partner’s equipment.  I also played around with positioning, mounting dildos on my Liberator Bonbon and suction cupping them to walls.  I took away some important lessons from that dildo double penetration session.

Double Penetration - Matic and Colours Soft

Akifu Toys Matic and NS Novelties Colours Soft

  • Ease into it – Even if one is a member of size royalty (like my girth-loving self), combining two average size toys requires some warm up.  If you’re not a girthaholic, you may want to choose slimmer options (1.25″ diameter or less).
  • Squish is good thing – While you don’t want a dildo that’s too floppy to thrust with, anything too firm is likely to poke, pinch and rub everybody the wrong way.  Dual density is great, but any flexibility/give is good.
  • Go the distance – A toy with a little extra length is easier to manipulate and maneuver to the right angle.
  • Lube is your friend – I mean, lube is always a good thing, but when dealing with silicone-on-silicone friction, it was absolutely critical.  Water-based is your best bet for DP play, as it’s compatible with both silicone sex toys and condoms.
  • All about that base – Dildos with large bases are awkward and complicate the process, unless that base is sturdy/heavy enough to keep the toy standing while riding it.
Double Penetration - Longstang and Gianni

Damn Average Longstang and Vamp Gianni

In the end, I chose Vamp Silicone’s Dominique in Softskin as our designated DP dildo.  It’s longer than average but not thicker, flexible but not floppy.  But I threw a few old favorites in the toy bag along with it, just in case.  That turned out to be a very wise decision, because some of those others (notably the Damn Average Longstang) would prove themselves well-suited for the task.  Here’s what I learned from the experience of double penetration play with my partner:

  • Go slowly and communicate with each other – That’s a critical rule for any new sexual endeavor, and it definitely applies here.  If something feels off, speak up. If your partner looks uncomfortable, check in.
  • DGIF (Dildo Goes In First) – For us, it worked a lot better to get the toy in position first, then have my partner ease in to make sure he was comfortable.
  • Bring your sense of adventure – You don’t need to limit yourself to realistic dildos.  My partner enjoyed feeling the ridges, bumps and textures of my fantasy toys when he was inside me.  In hindsight, I don’t know why that surprised me.  I know there are lots of different textured strokers on the market, but for some reason I had overlooked the fact that penises like variety too.
  • Bring your sense of humor – There’s a high probability that initial attempts will be awkward.  There may be moments where you wish someone had an extra hand, or you find yourselves twisted into a ridiculous position.  Don’t take it too seriously if things don’t go exactly as planned.  Have a good giggle and move on to a different approach.
  • Speak up – An enthusiastic partner enhances the fantasy, especially if they’re talented at dirty talk.
  • Enjoy the view – Choose positions (and/or strategically utilize mirrors) that let you see what’s happening.

For us, double penetration play turned out to be something we’re both into.  We’re still on the lookout for a third player to join in, but in the meantime, we’ll continue having fun with our dildo experiments.

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