Rant Break: Nope Overload

I'm supposed to be writing erotica tonight.  I want to, I really do.  Sadly, I cannot accomplish my goal because my brain has become clogged with massive amounts of NOPE.   The NOPE factor has reached critical mass and if I don't release some of it, I may explode.

Nope #1 - The Go-Go Glider is a no go

First up on the...
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Review: G-Spot Lollipop Double Pop (Medium/Large)

The G-Spot Lollipop Double Pop doesn't look like any other sex toy I've ever seen.  True to its name, it resembles a sweet, spherical lollipop on a very long stick, or a shimmering, magical fairy wand.  Upon unpacking it, I immediately attempted to twirl it like a baton... which was amusing until I smacked myself in the forehead. Given...
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